Best Cognitive Robotics Paper Award at ICRA 2019
When we speak of cognitive Robotics we refer to the ability of highly advanced algorithms to function on a level that is on par with the lower functions of the human intellect — meaning, recognition and automatic reaction. It’s kind of like when you see someone at work that you’d rather not make contact with and so you instinctively put on a Halloween mask and make scary noises to frighten them away from your desk.
This year the best cognitive robotics papers read at the ICRA included several interesting pieces on how to put lipstick and eyelashes on computer screens to make them gender specific, and a controversial paper that questions the whole concept of artificial intelligence hyperlinking for stud poker games and swapping street taco recipes. The paper’s author, Wilhelm van Moldfink, who holds a Degree in Fan Dancing from the University of Spritz, contends that if humans keep reading idiotic reports on dull and incomprehensible subjects then we might as well let the robots take over right now and go live on the beach somewhere. His thesis was given a standing moment of silence, before the audience stormed the podium due to a rumor that there would be free gift bags handed out.